High/Low 5.2.05

hey all...

what's shakin? it's monday for me.. (well for most of us) and it's been a really blah day for me. mentally i've been reintroduced to my desire to be more independent, FREE from my little debts and a fairly coordinated regime as to how I can save money on a regular basis.. enough that I could one day afford the luxuries that I that I wish for, and ON MY OWN. I have been blessed, I guess you would say, without lack, and know I take it for granted most of the time as we all do when our awareness isn't brought to something.

Sigh.. ever have one of those days when something is wrong but you can't put your finger on it? yea.. that's me today. I think todays uneasiness comes from specifically from my current financial experience although it's broader than that.. it's about freedom.

i look out my window.. a storm is coming in.. dark clouds coming toward my office and I can feel the effects.. it's darker and everything seems more tense, and still. Everyone's quiet today.. That's how i feel today.. like a storm is coming.. a life storm. If i choose to.. it could be a good thing.

and that's how i want to see it.

eww.. i'm getting way too somber today.. but that's how my day is going.. ok.. onto rambling thoughts..

well.. no, seems todays topic is about money.. which brings me to my biggest withdrawl from my bank account.. FOOD! I spend WAY too much money on going out to eat and food in general. whoa.. I could save SO much money if I didn't call my girl Naomi for 1/2 price fajitas.. cause waah waah.. i didn't FEEL like cooking. TOUGH KERILYN! i have grown very spoiled for quick service and no dishes to do.. it's made me lazy. So i decided to call my regular dinner companions and ask for their help in refraining me from going out.. for the month of May anyway... we'll see how i do.. but if i have at least $200 more in my savings next month to show of it.. it will be WAY more worth the grumbling I'm predicting will happen when I am staring at the refrigerator saying "there's nothing to eat!!!" Who knows.. maybe I'll create a fabulous new recipe that will turn into a legend.. and will spawn chain restaurants all over the world!!!! (um.. yea, back to reality kerilyn)

I say WAAH WAAH to myself.. and try to push thru this today.