and.. on that note..

and.. one of those artist women... Michelle .. posted about noting her happiest part of the day... got me thinking about mine today...

hmmm...

11.27.07

todays was the ~moment~ that i realized that the deadline that I've been so focused on.. so NOT myself about (the way I get when I'm feeling like I am not doing a good enough job.. I panic and become this person I don't like... an alter ego of Kerilyn) is coming down the home stretch of meeting her deadline.. and suddenly... my humor came back.. I relaxed.. was able to look around... talk to others.. and take a deep breath that isn't anxiety..

that was a pretty damn good moment in my day...

thanks for letting me share.

why is it?

that all the amazingly cool artist women that i see on the internet..

drink tea?

all kinds of tea.. camomile.. lemon.. earl grey... green...

my posting for the day is...

i gotta get into drinking more tea....

Thank you artistic beautiful women out there... for being out there.
You help inspire me... every day.
You know who you are... there are MANY of you...

much love,
Kerilyn

Today (11.7.07) I am..

Feeling pretty today...

I decided to wear the brown dress that I wore to the wedding this past weekend... I feel dressed up... it's Wednesday.. ready for the weekend...

So onto 3 things 2 things :

3 things that make me happy:

1. I got an email last nite from the Manager at the shop that I sent my cards too. She received them and asked if I'd send a pic and a little bio! Wowee.. My cards are officially in TWO shops now! How amazingly awesome is THAT!!! I'm going to knock out 20 cards this weekend (fingers crossed) so I can send her the final batch. She said she's excited to receive them for the holiday season! YEA!!! I should work on a christmas card.. but one thing at a time. I contacted a local printer and will be making appointments to go out and see the facilities to look into mass production. I'm trying to still accept that mass production is the next step.. I really do like spending time with my cards.. they are individual personal testiments as I create them.. but I would like to make more types of cards.. and that means I need to let go of one aspect.. maybe not totally but at least enough so I can focus on other areas..
2. My wonderful girlfriend Kyra is working on updating my website! I am soooooo excited!! And SOOO grateful!!! Yippee!!! I need to make my site more professional.. for so long it was mostly geared toward my personal life... for ya'll... but now..I am sending my site to prospective shops... and there's a lot of Kerilyn Ramblings on my site..
3. I had a really great conversation with my girl Michelle last nite that TOTALLY put my mind and heart at ease... Thank You honey!

2 things I am looking forward to today:
1. Another Day... Feeling pretty good today... just makes me happy!
2. Having chili and a grilled cheese sandwich for dinner tonite!

2 long term things I am looking forward to:
1. Finishing up those 20 cards so I can say that that shop is done and I can focus on the shop in Atlanta that wants my cards!
2. Buying a new pair of glasses!!! Yea! The glasses that I've been wearing are from 2001.. so I'm LONG overdue for a fresh and funky new pair! (Thanks Liz.. you rock!)

1 person I want to appreciate:
Not just one person.. EVERYONE.. but the few people that float to the top in this moment.. Matthew for being there consistantly thru the years..making sure I "keep it real".. Kyra.. for consistantly inspiring me... and living her creativity.. Michelle for her gentle reminders that we don't live in Black and White... Naomi for not making me feel alone that I swim in the deep end... I am so grateful for all my friends... When I look in the mirror I see ALL OF YOU...

Much Love.
Kerilyn

Today (11.05.07) I am...

emotionally exhausted...

Had a really good and really emotional weekend... went with Kevin to his friends wedding in the Shenandoah... it was beautiful..the leaves on the trees.. a little past their peak... we have had these plans to go to the wedding for quite a while now.. so I wanted to go..(I'm going to try not to go ramble on about my feelings here) ...I still don't want to talk about it.. I posted some pictures.. the wedding was OUTSIDE.. BRRR!!! It was chilly!!! I was freezing AND.. the bride was seriously 45 minutes late!

Ok.. onto funner topics! I finally took pictures of my studio... Check my photos on Flickr (See the little sneak peak on the Right of this Post) I thought I'd send you a glimpse of the amazing inspiration I feel when I'm at the Studio!!!

Oh and I don't like that it's getting dark by 5pm! BOO!!!

Happy Monday to you.
Kerilyn

Today (11.2.07) I am...

like a see saw... one second I feel good.. the next I feel like I don't trust myself... AT ALL...not a good space...

But I wanted to write because I've been SO INSPIRED lately by so many wonderful blogging women... Here are some of them that inspire me!!! It's funny... if you go to one of these inspiring womens sites.. you'll find them all supporting each other.. it's like a little inspiring family... I love it.. (and wish I knew how to join this club.. I totally would!)

Swirly Girl

Ink on my fingers

Bohemian Girl Designs

Colors on my mind

Superhero Journal

Poppy Talk

Penelope

Keri Smith

Janet Blyberg

Well the fall has settled in quickly... like a hot parking spot close to the building.. one person pulls out.. (summer) and fall has pulled in before the spot even got cold... well... it got cold... ok.. maybe this isn't a good metaphor... ha.

so no more warm weather... and Daylight Savings Time this weekend.. BOO!!! Dark by 5 o'clock is NO FUN!

K... Hope you have a great weekend... I'm going into the Shenandoah.. to go to a wedding... hopeful to have a lot of awesome new pics to share with you next week!

Kerilyn

Today (11.1.07) I am..

weirdly ok...

I don't want to go into it right now.. but I ended my relationship with Kevin.. I feel really sad and raw, doubting myself... an internal fight between my head and my heart going on.. but at the same time.. I feel weirdly ok too. Go figure. That's all I want to say about that for now.

So I have 60 cards to send to the Spa in Hilton Head, South Carolina today! I went to the Container store yesterday with my sister and bought a schnazzy box to put them in.. and will mail them today! I still have 20 cards more to send them.. and will hopefully get to that in the next two weeks.. but whew... making 60 cards takes a while! I finally am coming to accept that mass production is where I need to focus.. if I'm going to have the time to create new kinds of cards as well as trying to market my cards to other shops. I only have time to do one or the other.. and... next payday I'm submitting my application to copyright all my "Benchmark" cards as a collection. I researched it last week and found out that I can copyright them together.. AND it only costs $45.00! Woo Hoo! I thought it was going to be hundreds or thousands of dollars! So that makes me happy!

Last friday nite.. my girl Kristy and I went to see Tori Amos... HOLY SCHMOLY! We had the BEST seats!!! (She found 2 tickets on Craigslist for 110 bucks! AWESOME!) We had BOX SEATS!!! So we could spread out.. and get comfy... The show was AMAZING!!! She's amazing.. the depths to which her talent extends is awe inspiring... I mean... singing, playing the piano AND organ/synthesizer at the SAME TIME! AND looking hot too! Beautiful! I will admit that I thought of my girl Michelle who knows EVERY Tori song.. and who, because her plane was delayed.. missed getting to the Tori concert the week earlier.. You were there in spirit honey!

The leaves ... changing color... the crispness in the air... the sweaters... my apartments radiators warm to the touch... the snuggly socks while watching TV... Love the fall. (Don't like that it gets so dark so early.. boo)

Last weekend was ME weekend... friday nite was Tori Amos concert.. which kicked off 2 days of me me me.. I spent a significant portion of the weekend in the studio.. Borrowed Kevins Sirius boombox which played "The Coffee House" music continuously for hours.. with no commercials.. as I plugged away.. it was nice... just me.. Went got my nails done.. eyebrows waxed... groceries.. errands... some cleaning and laundry too.. it was really nice... I kinda missed me. Is that mean to say?

My boy Matthew has called me TWICE from Iraq!! He calls me at work.. and to hear his voice! Is like the best part of my day... He's ok... he's coming home for a few weeks of R&R in November.. hopefully we can "coordinate" a meeting.. a BIG hug.. and just being near him... I love that boy...

Ok ok ok.. enough of this fluff.. there is so much I want to say.. ramble on and on about my feelings.. my emotional state when it comes to Kevin, my life, my sadness... my hope for my future... what I want and don't want.. why I've made this decision. and where I'm at... that's really what I want to talk about... vomit the superhighway of feelings that I cannot keep inside me anymore... my head is recently like an overstuffed suitcase that won't close.. where this topic is all I have been thinking about... which is really the reason why my writings to you have been half hearted and why I feel that my postings have not been worth my hands on the keyboard... so let me try to process this... get to a place where I can write again what's happening inside me... and then we'll begin again...

Happy November to you all!
Much love.
Kerilyn